Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.

Directed by: Mike Maguire & Tom Kuntz
Written by: Robert D. Siegel & Todd Hanson
Release date: 2008-05-31
Runtime: 80 minutes
Tagline: America's Finest News Source.
Cast:
Len Cariou Len Cariou
Norm Archer 
Steven Seagal Steven Seagal
Cock Puncher 
Larissa Laskin Larissa Laskin
Dana Dobbs 
Ken Takemoto Ken Takemoto
Sensei 
Don McManus Don McManus
Dennis McCormick 
Michael Bolton Michael Bolton
Michael Bolton 
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Also known as:
  • News Movie
  • Луковые новости
  • Spravy TV Onion