Reviews provided by RottenTomatoes
Richard Corliss, TIME Magazine: Retaliation is less a sequel than an antidote to the calcified mound of crap that ostensibly inspired it. Read more
Glenn Kenny, MSN Movies: When it comes to big and loud, this is the movie to beat for at least this week; what makes it entertaining is its unabashed wallow in these qualities ... Read more
Neil Genzlinger, New York Times: There should be a "Fans Only" sign at the door of every theater. Read more
Joe Morgenstern, Wall Street Journal: I won't pretend that I had a great time watching "G.I. Joe: Retaliation." Read more
Scott Bowles, USA Today: A more sure-footed shoot-'em-up that finds some heart, wit and perhaps enough momentum to spawn a formidable action franchise. Read more
Soren Anderson, Seattle Times: As for plot and character development, well, um ... did I mention the picture has a lot of guns? Read more
Justin Chang, Variety: Retaliation makes any number of ham-fisted bids for topical relevance, and naturally almost every one of them represents an affront to good taste. Read more
Scott Tobias, AV Club: A lumbering beast, bogged down by too many characters and an incomprehensible plot. Read more
Bill Goodykoontz, Arizona Republic: Ever played a video game with a friend and had to sit there while he hogged it, leaving you to do nothing but watch for what seemed like hours? Read more
Tom Russo, Boston Globe: Good luck recalling any other would-be set pieces a couple of days after you've seen Retaliation. Read more
Michael Phillips, Chicago Tribune: The directive behind this sequel, clearly, was non-stop action. Let's think about that phrase a second. Do we really want our action movies to deliver action that does not stop? Ever? I get a little tired of action sequences that won't stop. Read more
Tom Long, Detroit News: No go, "Joe." Read more
Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly: It's well-executed technocratic action fluff. But it did leave me buzzed rather than drained. Read more
Todd McCarthy, Hollywood Reporter: Good if you're a 12-15-year-old boy, bad if you're just about anyone else. Read more
Betsy Sharkey, Los Angeles Times: To borrow from Jack in the Box, "G. I. Joe: Retaliation" is one hot mess. Read more
Christy Lemire, Associated Press: That's not to say that this G.I. Joe is good, aside from a couple of dazzling action set pieces, but at least it's efficient in its muscular mindlessness. Read more
Rafer Guzman, Newsday: The junky pleasures of the first installment now just seem like junk in this noisy, nonsensical, lead-footed sequel. Read more
Stephen Whitty, Newark Star-Ledger: Unmitigated nonsense to anyone but diehard fans. Read more
Mark Jenkins, NPR: What's the difference between an action figure and an action star? Very little in G.I. Joe: Retaliation, which features no performances of note, even from such combat-tested thespians as Bruce Willis, Jonathan Pryce and Dwayne Johnson. Read more
Joe Neumaier, New York Daily News: The G.I. Joe team is back, and most of their sophomore movie adventure, G.I. Joe Retaliation, is as bland as their name and as subtle as an exploding tank. Read more
Kyle Smith, New York Post: "G.I. Joe: Retaliation" has enough hoo-ah to bring a satisfying blast of blockbustery summer to dreary March. Read more
Michael Sragow, Orange County Register: Movies like GI Joe: Retaliation want to give you the video-game equivalent of an itchy trigger-finger. It's an emotion-free zone. Read more
James Berardinelli, ReelViews: Everything in G.I. Joe: Retaliation is perfunctory - technically proficient but soulless. It's not exciting. It's boring. Read more
Richard Roeper, Chicago Sun-Times: Like a Dumpster bin behind Tiffany's, this contains nothing but well-packaged garbage. Read more
Peter Hartlaub, San Francisco Chronicle: The filmmakers appear to have handed a dozen or so G.I. Joe dolls to a 9-year-old, watched him play for 110 minutes, and then shot a scene-for-scene remake. Read more
Joe Williams, St. Louis Post-Dispatch: Good Lord, what did we do to deserve "G.I. Joe: Retaliation"? Read more
Liam Lacey, Globe and Mail: What a blast G.I. Joe: Retaliation is! And then another blast, and another, in a series of concussive jolts that shred any conventional sense of story as thoroughly as anything since the last Michael Bay film. Read more
Peter Howell, Toronto Star: It's like a giant explosion on a distant planet, observed but not felt. Read more
Tom Huddleston, Time Out: It looks as though some bright spark at Joe HQ decided that what the series needed was to lose its fun, post-'Team America' self-awareness and replace it with unironic jingoism, military-fetish hardware and heavy-handed nods to real world events. Read more
Alan Scherstuhl, Village Voice: It's not enough to call this the rare franchise action movie to bring the goods; it's the even rarer one whose creators seem to understand what the goods even are. Read more
Bilge Ebiri, New York Magazine/Vulture: It's not stoopid anymore, but just plain stupid. Read more
Stephanie Merry, Washington Post: People may flock to G.I. Joe: Retaliation despite its inert illogic. But don't say you weren't warned. As a wise man once said, "knowing is half the battle." Read more